Denial
by Dgm-yoai-lover
Summary: Lavi dies, and Allen seeks comfort in Kanda, despite not truly being able to leave the memory of Lavi behind. Things will get complicated when they find out Lavi came back to life. AllenxLavi Laven KandaxAllen yullen LAST CHAPTER RE-WRITTEN!
1. Death of a comrade

**A oneshot till I get over the damn writers block.**

**Pretty safe to say I don't own dgm.**

**--**

They say that when a person dies, it merely looks as though they are sleeping.

But that day at Lavi's funeral, Allen found it wasn't true in the least.

When Lavi slept, he slept on his stomach, arm curled under the pillow, a slight smile teasing the corners of his mouth, his face calm and serene. But now, in the elaborate coffin, he lay on his back, his face dead and pale, hands folded on his chest, his flaming red hair brushed neatly to either side of his face. It didn't look anything like Lavi.

Arm shaking, Allen reached forward and brushed the red locks back into their normal position, but it didn't help. It still didn't look like him. This wasn't Lavi, this was just... A corpse.

Hot tears stung Allen's face as he remembered. One moment, he and Lavi had been fighting off Akuma in the mountains, the next, Allen had woken up in hospital three days later, Komui telling him Lavi had died of a stomach wound, and handing him the redhead's favourite headband and his hammer.

'This is impossible...' Allen murmured, 'He can't just... It's...'

'Beansprout...' Allen heard Kanda's voice behind him. It lacked the usual mocking harshness.

'This isn't him.' Allen spoke aloud, his voice slightly strangled, 'It can't be. No way Lavi could be finished off like that, he wouldn't have allowed it.'

'Beansprout...' Kanda repeated. 'He's gone.'

'Nope,' Allen shook his head, 'He's not dead. It's not right for him to die, it's not... Not...'

Allen couldn't go on; the tears were coming to fast, blinding him, and it was all the boy could do to stop the sobs escaping his mouth. He leaned against Kanda, pressing his face against his shirt, feeling the cloth dampen as it soaked up the liquid in Allen's eyes. He expected Kanda to pull away, disgusted by this act of deep despair, but instead, he put his arms around Allen, embracing him gently.

No, it couldn't end like this, not after everything that had happened, when Lavi had taken him in his arms and kissed him so lovingly, their bare skin pale under the full moon. No, none of this was really happening, it all had to be a bad dream.

But deep down Allen knew it wasn't.

--

Far away, in a different dimension, a young Bookman sat, chained to the wall, red hair flopped pathetically in his face. He didn't know what the Noah wanted with him, only that they had made sure the exorcists wouldn't look for him.

That meant Allen wasn't waiting for him. But, even if Allen wasn't waiting for him, Lavi was going to return, even if it took a thousand years.

'I'm coming back, Allen.'

--

**Oneshot over.**

**Meh, pretty crappy I know. REVEIW!**


	2. Two months later

**Ok, since you guys were so insistant, I decided to continue.**

**Wooh! My mate gave me a timcanpy plushie!**

**I don't own d.gray-man.**

**--**

_'Name's Lavi,' the redhead smiled from the door._

_'I'm Allen Walker...'_

'OI!' Kanda's voice cut through Allen's dream, 'Get up!'

Allen jerked awake and sat up. To his shock, his face was slightly stiff with dried tears. He wiped his cheeks with his sleeve.

'What's wrong?' Kanda sneered, 'Bad dream?'

'Yes, I dreamt Jerry ran out of miterashi.'

'Che.'

Allen rolled his eyes, stood up and reached for his coat. He and Kanda were on a train heading back from a mission, but the speed of the train was slowing, indicating their stop was coming up.

Sighing heavily, the white haired exorcist went to open the door, but before he could he felt Kanda grab his wrist.

'Oi, Beansprout...'

Allen turned to face the samurai. Kanda pushed him against the closed door, and placed his lips on Allen's. After a moment, he pulled away, pushed past Allen and walked out the door. Allen just stared at the back of the compartment, trying to compose himself. He had been dating Kanda for two months, but everytime he was kissed, he wanted to cry. He could never tell Kanda that though, he could never say he felt like he was betraying Lavi, because that wouldn't be right. He was with Kanda now, and that was that. Lavi was dead, and he wasn't coming back.

'HURRY UP BEANSPROUT!'

Allen jumped slightly at the sound of Kanda's voice and hurried after him. Kanda suspected something, he had too. Because everytime Allen thought about Lavi Kanda would always kiss him, and a few times, he'd tried to pull him onto a bed. Allen wanted to love him, but he was never able to let go of the Bookman's memory. Everytime he kissed Kanda, he would see his face hurt and shocked, as though he'd walked in on them cheating. That's what Allen felt like too. He was cheating on Lavi.

--

Lavi sat in a dark cell, boredly tracing in the dust on the ground. It was a windowless prison, made of stone and lined with hay, and the only light was that of weird floating lights that were just out of reach. The red head sighed and laid on his stomach and continued his sketchings, the shackles on his arms jingling sllightly. He was trying to draw up an escape plan, but there were no weapons for him to use, no windows, and there wasn't even a door, apart from when Road came to torment him.

He shddered at the thought of the girl, and wiped his failed drawing away.

'Dammit,' He muttered, 'Theres gotta be a way.'

'You're wasting your time,' A voice said.

Lavi looked up sharply, expecting to see a Noah, but instead he saw a man in his late twenties with a kind face wearing a suit. He was leaning against the wall, reading a book.

'Who are you?' Lavi sat up, curious. This man had a strange feeling about him.

'Just a soul.' The man smiled, looking up as he closed the book nd pocketed it. You're Lavi right?'

'Yeah, why?'

'Hm, just wondering. Anyway, as I was saying, it's useless trying to escape. Once your soul is dragged from your body and put in Roads dream prison, you're pretty much done for.'

'What?!' Lavi blinked, 'S-so i'm dead?'

'Well yeah, haven't you wondered why you never get hungry?'

Lavi sweatdropped. The man smiled kindly, and started to slowly walk towards him. Lavi shrunk back against the wall, fearful, but the man simply placed a hand on his head and ruffled his hair a bit.

'Those shackles, they mean you're trapped. Only way to be untrapped is to break them. If you did that, you'd come back to life.

'Hardly,' Lavi laghed grimly, 'I'm an excorcist. I was probably cremated.'

'As long as your ashes are still all together your body would reappear at the place you died.'

The redhead raised his eyebrow, suspicious. The man went on.

'Of course, only way you cold break those shackles is if you had something worth going back to. And I mean, REALLY worth it, a person you wold gladly die for. Do you have someone like that? Another exorcist perhaps?'

Lavi's eyes widened. The man smiled, waiting patiently. Finally, the redhead found his voice.

'Y-you... Why are you helping me?'

'Cos i'm not supposed to,' He shrugged, chuckling. 'A long time ago, Road killed me and trapped me here, using me as n obedient servent, and I left behind someone I dearly loved. But before I could figure out how to escape I was turned into an akuma. The person you left, he is very greived. Don't let Allen feel sad.'

Lavi gasped. How did this man know who...?

Suddenly, comprehension dawned on his face. He smiled.

'Well, I guess i'd better get back to him then, Mana Walker.'

Mana smiled kindly. Lavi stood up, weighed down by the heavy chains.

'So how do I get out of these things?'

Mana Told him. Lavi gripped the chains in his hands and started yanking at them, ignoring the pin caused by the skin being ripped off by the metal. He pictured Allen's face, the face he wanted to see again. He could barely remember what anyone looked like, including himself, having not seen a mirror in months, But Allen was still clear as day, burned into his memory, giving him a comfortable warmth. He wanted to hold him again, to feel his lips on his own, to hear his cheerful greeting in the morning when he woke up.

'DAMMIT LET ME GO!'

With one final yank, the chains came free of the wall. He stumbled back and fell on his backside, staring in suprise at how easy it had suddenly been. The shackles around his arms faded, and when he looked down, he was surprised to see he was becoming increasingly transparent.

'Looks like it worked,' Mana smiled. He as well as the prison cell was becoming blurry.

'Make sure you tell Allen I love him, ok?'

Lavi nodded, and the room was engulfed in blackness.

--

Kanda roughly grabbed Allen and pinned him to the bed, locking him in a kiss. He crawled furthur onto the bed, putting his knee between the younger's legs to prevent furthur escape. Allen made a frightened noise as he struggled, turning his head, breaking the kiss. Kanda sighed and sat back on his knees, letting Allen up.

'Sorry...' Allen wouldn't meet his eye, 'Could you... Please leave?'

'No. Not until you tell me what we're doing. You obviousl don't care about me the way I do for you, so why are we even in a relationship?'

'Kanda..' Allen began, sighing. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know why Kanda was so insistant, he didn't know why he kept coming, why he put up with Allen's coldness, he didn't know why the man loved him.

'You know what?' Kanda stood up and reached for his discarded coat, 'Forget it. I'm outta here.'

'No, Kanda, wait..!' Allen crawled to the edge of the bed, but the samurai was already at the door. He reached for the knob, but before he could grasp it, there was a knock at the door. Kanda withdrew his hand, startled, and the door opened to reveal Lenalee's face.

'Oh! Kanda! I didn't know you were here-'

'Well now you do. What is it?'

'Um...' Lenalee glanced at Allen, 'My brother needs you two for another mission.'

'Another one?' Allen stood up, surprised, 'But we only got back an hor ago!'

'I know but that can't be helped, sorry.'

Allen sighed and nodded. After casting a cautious glance at Kanda, the two exorcists followed Lenalee out into the hall.

--

**Ok! please not the spell check isn't working so there are probably mistakes. Sorry.**

**Sorry for the crappiness.**

**REVEIW!**


	3. Akuma appear

**I'm baaaaaaack... (imposing latin opera music)**

**Lavi: oh no! she's gonna make us be gay!**

**Allen: hide me!**

**LAVI: WAAAAIT...i'm not in this chapter! YAY!**

**Allen: (annoyed) i hate you.**

**Kanda: ( reading fic) No you dont, according this...**

**I still don't own it.**

**--**

'Ok, Allen, remember those mountains you got injred in two moths ago? I'm afraid yo have to go back.'

Allen could do nothing but stare. Go back to the last place Lavi had been? Where he'd died?

'Allen are you ok?' Komui placed a concerned hand on his shoulder, 'I'm sorry, I wanted to send someone else but it's not me who assigns exorcists to missions.'

'I'm fine...' Allen took a deep breath, 'Kanda's coming too?'

'Yup!' Komui nodded cheerfully. Kanda, who stood next to them made an uncommited noise. Allen serched his face, wanting to know what he was feeling, but all he could see was a cold expressionless mask.

'Ok, we'll see you later then.' Allen attempted a weak smile. He took the mission guide in his hands and left the room, heading towards the canals. He could sense Kanda following him, and tried to seem confident... Unfortunately Kanda was good at seeing through guises.

'Beansprout, stop and look at me.'

Allen kept on walking, and felt the samurai grab his arm painfully. He stopped and wheeled around, but did not meet his gaze. No doubt getting exasperated, Kanda put his hand under the shorter boy's chin and forced him to look up. After a moment of study, he spoke.

'So you still love him.'

'Wha-what?' Allen blinked. 'But I'm with you!'

'That doesn't change the facts, brat. If you weren't ready for another relationship then why the hell did you-'

'I don't know... But it's ok now! I'm with you! so-'

'Che, whatever.'

He let his hands fall away from Allen's arms and brushed past him coldly. Allen stood there, shaking slightly. He wasn't sure what just happened, but Kanda was starting to figure it all out.

He sighed and walked in the same direction Kanda did. He really didn't know why he had done it. It's just... Well, it was about a week after Lavi died, and since his funeral Allen had pretty much locked himself in his room... Not the cursed boy's room, Lavi's room.

Anyway, no one knew where he'd gone and several people were under the impression he'd killed himself, and searched the "suicide spots" in the order. But Kanda simply went straight to Lavi's room banged on the door and told him to come out before half the order has a heart attack. Allen had not answered, and the samurai had kicked the door in. Insults were shouted, tears were shed, and then Allen had collapsed into his arms, crying. Just like on the day of the funeral, he'd hugged him back, and for some reason, Allen had kissed him.

He didn't know why, maybe it was some comfort thing, but kissing in Lavi's room made him forget a little, and there wasn't so mch pain.

Then, all of a sudden, he and Kanda were in a relationship, and he had no idea how it had happened.

But he didn't complain, he didn't voice that it was a mistake, because, to lead someone on like that, to use someone as an exit for your problems, that was a horrible thing to do. To break up now...

That would make him a horrible person.

And besides Allen was sure in time, maybe he could grow to love Kanda. He couldn't be hanging on to the memory of dead man forever.

Kanda glanced at Allen as he settled in the boat next to him. The finder pushed them off, and Allen sighed and drew his knees up to his chest. He knew the boy was upset about going, but once a mission was assigned, you had to complete it.

The older man clenched his fists. He was angry.

He was angry at Allen for lying to him, and angry at Lavi for dying.

He didn't hate Lavi, he'd actually been tolerable when he wasn't calling him Yu-Chan... And as long as he made Allen happy, then whatever, but now he was dead Allen was a wreck and was forcing himself to feel for Kanda, and that was extremely annoying.Although at first he'd hated to admit it, he cared for the Beansprout greatly, even though he knew those feelings couldn't be returned.

He hated to admit, but he was clinging to the hope maybe Allen would eventually develop feelings for him.

It made him feel desparate and weak, and he knew he should break up with him... But he didn't want to.

The boat arrived at the platform and the exorcists climed out and asceded the stairs that would take them to the train station. As they emerged on the croweded platform, he looked at Allen. His silver eyes were downcast, and he was wringing his hands nervously.

'Look Beansprout it's just a mountain, it's not like you're gonna have to watch him get killed again.'

What he said was thoughtless, he knew that, but he was sick of this. Why couldn't he just get over it? But then, he was still practically a kid, and was naiive and soft. He didn' have the disciplane Kanda did, or the harsh personality.

Allen didn't react when Kanda spoke, he just clenched his jaw to stop his lip from trembling. He and Kanda continued to push the way through the crowd until they boarded the large steam engine.

Kanda immediently headed for the first class carridge, but Allen just stood there.

'Oi, Beansprout, what are you doing?'

'I-I-I'm just gonna walk around for a bit, i'll meet you later...'

The fifteen year old turned and left. Kanda made an annoyed noise and continued on his way.

'Avoiding me, huh?'

--

_'Hey Beansprout-Chan!'_

_'Stop calling me that Lavi! I have a name!'_

_'Yeah, so do I but I don't mind when people call me Rabbit.'_

_'That's just you though...' Allen grinned. Lavi raised his eyebrow and put his arm around him._

_'Oh? What's me?'_

_'Insane...'_

_Lavi snorted in amusement and gave him a quick squeezing hug. Allen tensed, surprised, but after a second relaxed and leaned his head against the redhead's collarbone and placed his hand on the bookman's heart. He sighed contently and felt Lavi fiddle with a strand of his white hair._

_'You know...' He sighed, 'If people saw you from behind hugging me like this, they'd think you were an old, short pedeophile.'_

_Allen anger-veined and pulled away to hit him on the head. Lavi grinned._

_'I love you.' He said cheerily in a casual way. Allen blinked in surprise, a light blush spreading across his cheeks._

_'What did you say?'_

_'I love you. I know we've only known eachother for a while but i think i love you... Screw that, I definitely love you.'_

Allen gasped and sat up, panting like he'd run a marathon. He had fallen asleep on one of the seats, and looking around, he saw the train empty, and it was now dark outside. He sighed heavily, rubbed his eyes and got up. He was hungry, so he headed towards the dining car, but before he could get there, the train pulled to a screeching stop. Allen cried out as the sudden stop threw him off balance and he grabbed a seat to stop him from falling.

'We can' be there yet...' He wondered outloud. He looked out the window, and instead of a train station he saw white fields, with snow capped mountains in the distance.

'Must be an emergency stop...'

With this thought in mind, he turned around and headed towards the drivers carrige, wanting to see what was going on. He threw open the door, and to his srprise there was no driver, but instead a pile of dusty clothes in front of the controls.

At the same time, his cursed eye activated.

--

Kanda jerked awake as he heard a scream and a loud explosion. The entire train shook, almost throwing him to the floor. Swearing loudly, he grabbed Mugen, jumped to his feet and ran out the door, where a cold blast of wind hit him.

Most of the train had been blown away, and he could see Allen nearby, fighting off a swarm of level two's.

'DAMMIT BEANSPROUT!' Kanda yelled angrily as he activated his innocence, 'With you around the mission wont even start before we have to fight!'

He sent hells insects after a small group coming at him and ran to assist the shorter boy.

--

Allen was vaguely aware of Kanda attacking some akuma somewhere to his right, but he was sure the older man could handle it, and concentrated on a rather annoying level two swarm. They all looked like giant wasps, and were really fast, so fast that even with crowned clown he was struggling to keep up with them. The quickly surrounded him, and several behind him came at him while the rest at the front flew away slightly. He dodged forward, chasing the ones at the from and at the same time running to a safe distance from the others, sending out a few cross graves as he did. This seemed to continue a few times, and though Allen didn't notice at the time, he was slowly moving closer to a steep cliff.

Then, without warning, he felt something collide with his back, and he was pushed over the edge.

He screamed in surprise and tried to use clown belt to save himself, but an akuma (level three) above him knocked it away with mallet-like hands, and flew speedly down to catch up with him.

'CROSS GRA-!'

Before The exorcist could complete the attack, the level three put on a busrt of speed and hit him with the mallet arms, ploughing him into the ground below in a matter of milliseconds. He cried out in pain as the akuma continued to push him, and to his horror, he heard a crack as the ground beneath him shifted. He was on a frozen lake.

'Argh! Dammit!' He gasped as he was pushed agaist the ice, all the wind being knocked out of his lungs. His limbs were too jarred to move, it hurt even to twich his fingers. The akuma grinned and increased the pressure, and the ice broke. While he didn't go in all th way, Allen felt himse;lf sink under the akumas hands, and icey water welled up around him, covering his nose and mouth, soaking through to his skin. He choked and tried to arch his neck, desparate for air, but he was so cold it felt like he'd completely frozen. He could feel himself drifting into unconciousness, a combinaton of lack of oxygen and lack of heat to blame.

_'No,' _he thought as his world went dark, '_Not yet, I can't...'_

_--_

_Allen made a contented noise as he felt Lavi stroke his naked back._

_'Alleeeeennn... Time to wake uuuuup...'_

_Allen blindly reached for a spare pillow, grabbed it, and shoved it in where he estimated Lavi's face to be with as much sleepy force as he could muster._

_'Still tired, go away...' Allen murmured into Lavi's chest._

_'That's kinda hard to do when you're laying on top of me.'_

_'Then stay there and be my pillow.'_

_He heard Lavi chuckle, and then felt Lavi resume the stroking of his spine. He felt warm and happy, something he didn't get many chances to feel. It felt nice._

_--_

**Allen: HA! You WERE in this chapter!**

**Lavi: Damn you Harms and you spontanious Ideas.**

**Me: Well i do my best.**

**REVEIW!**


	4. So does Lavi

**I don't own this. If I did…. Laven to the max!**

**Note: ZOO is an Australian porn magazine they advertise on TV. I don't know the name of any better known ones.**

**Ha! Did you guys see episode 94? Hilarious! It should have been called battle of the Lenalee lovers!**

**And the new chapter of the manga…. HOLY SHIT!**

**--**

Lavi cried out as he tripped in the snow again and threw out his arm to break his fall. Grumbling, he slowly got back up and shivered. His exorcist coat was warm, but the sleeves of the jacket only came down to his elbows, and he had very cold arms. When he'd woken up, he'd noticed three things; His headband and hammer were missing, it was snowing meaning it was winter, and there were a hell of a lot explosions going on in the fields at the bottom of the mountain, so that was where he was heading. Since he was defenseless, if there were Akuma he would be in trouble, but if there were exorcists as well… Free ride back to headquarters.

He stepped onto level ground, and almost tripped on something metal. At closer inspection he found the metal to be train tracks, and looking up he saw a motionless train in the distance, near where he had seen the explosions. He jogged closer, and saw a tall figure. In the moonlight, he could see the shine of a blade.

'YU!' Lavi cried happily, picking up his pace. Kanda looked up, a completely dumfounded look plastered on his face. As the redhead got closer, however, the samurai regained his senses, and with a flash, held out Mugen to Lavi's neck, resulting in the bookman stopping. He swallowed nervously, feeling the blade on the important vein near his throat.

'U-uh, Y-Yu?'

'Shut up Akuma,' Kanda narrowed his eyes dangerously, 'Tell my why you look like the rabbit.'

'What?' Lavi blinked, 'I'm not an Akuma! I'm Lavi!'

'Lavi's dead.'

'Well I was, but now I'm not.'

As soon as Lavi had said that he realized how stupid and impossible it sounded.

'Uh…Oh! I know!' Lavi sweatdropped, then he suddenly grinned as a light bulb appeared over his head, 'Yu, when we were kids, you broke into the wine cellar and drank most of the expensive French stuff. While you were getting over the hangover, I took the blame. At your thirteenth birthday party, I gave you a special edition of ZOO I had managed to steal from one of the adults. When we were sixteen-'

'Alright I get it!' Kanda's face was red as he lowered his sword. Only Lavi would know that stuff. He sighed heavily.

'Why are you alive? We had a funeral and you were dead, and you were cremated!'

'Wellllll…' Lavi scratched his head. Truth be told, he couldn't really remember why he was alive. He just knew he'd been gone for a long time. 'To be honest, I'm not completely sure.'

Kanda glared, still suspicious.

'Are you under the control of Noah or Akuma?'

Lavi shrugged. Kanda sighed again, knowing they would get no where like this. He decided to trust him, however, since no human, let alone Noah or Akuma, knew of the things Lavi had told him.

'Whatever…' Kanda said stiffly, brushing past him, 'I'm going up the mountain to check for more Akuma, you-'

A vein throbbed in his temple as he realized Lavi was hugging his back, rubbing his cheek happily against his coat.

'Rabbit…' Kanda said through clenched teeth warningly.

'It's been so long!' Lavi cried happily, 'I'm so glad to see you!'

Yup. This was definitely Lavi.

'BAKA USAGI!' Kanda swung around with his sword.

Lavi grinned and jumped out of the way. Kanda put his hands on his hips.

'You stay here. Got it? Beansprout ran off somewhere and I don't have the time to go chasing after him, so wait for him here. If he's still in one piece, send him up after me, and wait in the train.'

Lavi nodded and saluted. Kanda turned away and began to head towards the mountain path, feeling confused. Lavi was alive, which was good, as well as confusing in itself, but what would Allen do?

--

_Allen rushed into the motel room, freezing and covered in snow. Lavi sat up in his bed and grinned._

'_See? Told ya going for a walk was a bad idea.'_

'_I didn't think light snow fall would turn into a blizzard!' Allen pouted, rubbing his hands together to generate some heat. Lavi watched him carefully as the younger boy went over to his own bed and took off his damp exorcist coat, his civilian clothes underneath completely dry. Lavi waited until he'd kicked off his shoes and socks before he moved. Without getting out of the bed, he reached across, grabbed one of Allen's hands, and without a strong yank, he pulled Allen back onto the redhead's bed. Allen cried out in __surprise as he fell into Lavi's arms. Lavi smiled lovingly down at him and covered him with the blankets, and snuggled next him, wrapping his scarf around their necks. Allen blushed._

'_Um, Lavi? I do have to sleep in my own bed sometimes.'_

'_But this is nicer,' Lavi grinned, 'Besides, you're cold. The heater is busted. Might as well take advantage of a warm body.'_

'_That sounded so wrong Lavi.'_

_The two boys chuckled, and Lavi held the other closer. Allen closed his eyes, letting his lover's warmth envelope him, breathing in his scent. He was getting sleepy…_

'Wakey wakey Sleeping Beauty.'

Allen was sure this voice was outside of his dream, but how could it be? It was Lavi! He kept his eyes closed. He was dead, that was all. He had frozen, or drowned, or done both at the same time, and he was dead.

'Come on Allen….'

Allen felt a warm hand cup his cheek. Grudgingly, he opened his misty grey eyes, and found himself staring up into a relieved green one.

It was like everything froze. The person he so longed to see, who he'd dreamt about, who he loved… He was right here, and yet he couldn't bring himself to move or speak.

'Hey…' Lavi grinned happily, 'You scared the crap outta me down there. I was waiting in the train but I got impatient and went looking for you. Found you almost dead in the water. Good thing the material of your coat protected you.'

'L-Lavi…' Allen managed to choke. His limbs were screaming in pain as he moved, corked from the force of the akuma's blows, but he didn't care. He reached up with one hand, and placed it onto the bookman's hand on his cheek. He was expecting to burst into tears any second, but his eyes felt dry. He closed them, thinking hard.

'No no no! Don't go back to sleep! Come on Allen, I really missed ya and you just wanna sleep? That is so mean!'

'Shut up Lavi.' Allen gripped his hand. He really wasn't sure what else to say. He wasn't going to let himself feel happy just yet. This wasn't an Akuma, but it could still be a Noah. Maybe Road had dragged him into a dream, or maybe this was Lulubell in disguise. But then… Why would they have saved him rather then let him die? He'd been unconscious in the ice, the perfect opportunity to kill off an exorcist.

'A-are you real?' Allen knew it sounded stupid as he looked at Lavi. Lavi grinned, and pinched his cheek.

'OW!' Allen rubbed his cheek as Lavi laughed. Slowly, the white haired exorcist sat up, being careful not to disturb his sore muscles. He was lying in the first class compartment, both heaters under the seats humming gently. On the other side of the compartment was his coat, and on his knees in front of his seat was Lavi, grinning up at him.

'So you can move?'

'Barely…' Allen stared, unable to believe they were making small talk.

'Yu's gone up the mountain,' Lavi explained as he sat next to the younger boy, 'He'll be back sometime in the morning. He said we gotta wait here if you're injured.'

Oh right. Kanda.

The shock of seeing Lavi had pushed the other man right out of his mind. And now… Well, it felt like his mind had suddenly collapsed! Stay with Kanda and have Lavi hate him and be unhappy, or break up with Kanda and feel like a horrible person and have Kanda hate him and be unhappy. Either way, it looked like everyone would be miserable. Hell, maybe Lavi would hate him for being with Kanda in the first place, and he'd have the two people he was closest to wanting to kill him.

'Oh god…' Allen groaned as he put his heads in his hands.

'Allen?' Lavi looked alarmed.

'I have a headache… It's too confusing….'

'What is?'

Allen shook his head. He felt sick. He took a deep breath and sat up.

'N-nothing, I'm fine. But you…. Are….'

'Alive?'

'Un…' Allen nodded. Lavi smiled and patted his head.

'I don't know either…. Are you warm enough?'

Allen nodded. He wasn't sure how long he'd been in the water or how long he was out for, but he wasn't very cold.

He was however, exhausted, and he found himself leaning against Lavi's shoulder, his eyelids feeling like lead. The sound of Lavi breathing was very soothing.

'I love you…' Lavi murmured. 'I really do.'

Allen wasn't sure what to say as his eyelids gave out to gravity.

--

Lavi absent-mindedly stroked Allen's hair. He'd honestly almost had a heart attack when he'd spotted Allen lying just beneath the surface of the ice lake. He'd seriously thought he was dead, and after fishing him out, it had taken several excruciating minutes to resuscitate him, then after getting him back up to the train, he'd changed him into dry clothes he'd found in Allen's suitcase, the switched the heaters up as high as they could go. He'd lain next to him, sharing his heat, just wanting the boy to wake up, and had only moved about two hours later, when the boy showed signs of waking up.

To come back to life and find Allen not there… was not life at all.

A few minutes passed, and dawn peeked over the horizon, making the snow outside train glow pretty shades of red, orange and gold. He stared outside, taking in the view. After spending god knows how long… Where ever he had been… Everything seemed brighter, and more noticeable.

'_People take the world for granted_,' Panda had once told him when he was a child, _'They think it will be around forever, and that they will be around forever, and abuse the environment without noticing the fine features of it.'_

'That's just depressing…' Lavi inwardly chuckled.

Just then, the train compartment door slid open, and Kanda entered, rubbing his sword arm in annoyance. There was a rip in his sleeve, and his hair had fallen out, but he was otherwise unharmed.

'Welcome back Yu!' Lavi grinned.

Kanda looked up. Lavi sat there with a big stupid grin on his face, Allen sleeping against his shoulder, with the redhead's arms around him. Unable to keep his composure, his face faltered as he stared.

'Yu?' Lavi noticed the slight change in the samurai's expression.

'Shut up.'

'Allen's ok,' Lavi explained, 'He was stuck in cold water, and he seems to have suffered some blunt trauma so he can't move a lot, but he's had worse.'

'Right…. Did he tell you anything?'

'What? Um, no…'

'Right.' Kanda repeated, turning his face. So Lavi knew nothing huh? Very interesting.

'I'm going to find a phone.'

He left. Lavi furrowed his brow. Why had he looked at them weirdly? He'd known for ages that he and Allen had been going out, and Kanda had barely batted an eyelid. So why the weird "holy-crap-they're-a-couple" look now?

'Mn…' Allen mumbled in his sleep. Lavi looked down to see him yawning and sleepily rubbing his eyes. He looked so cute Lavi thought he was gonna faint.

'You gonna stay awake this time?' Lavi teased. Allen blinked, and pulled away from Lavi's embrace. He looked kind of guilty.

'Yes, did I hear Kanda just then?'

'He's looking for a phone.'

'Oh… Did he um, say anything to you?'

'NO… Look, is there something I should know? Cos Kanda asked if you had told me anything.'

'No, there's nothing!' Allen shook his head, creeping further away, 'I mean, you've been dead for two months so we've got no news for you at all! It's fine!

Lavi was not convinced. He wanted to ask more questions, but before he could, Kanda reappeared at the door.

'Oi, we gotta walk back along the tracks to the nearest town. Get off your arses.'

Lavi nodded, stood up, and glanced at Allen. The kid could barely walk, and was about to make the offer to carry him when Kanda strode in wordless, seized Allen around the waist and switched him to his back. Allen looked in pain, but Lavi just put that down to his injuries.

'Aw, Yu, I wanted to carry him! I'm the one who loves him!'

Kanda glared angrily, and walked through the door. Lavi sighed, feeling disappointed… And confused. Since when did Kanda voluntarily carry Allen around while there was a perfectly capable person right there?

'So weird…' Lavi shook his head as he followed. It felt like he'd woken up in a parallel world! Allen was shying away from him; Kanda was treating Allen kindly…. He was seriously missing something.

--

The walk along the tracks was a quiet, awkward one. Lavi tried to strike up several conversations, desperate to know how everyone was and what was new, and he got civil answers, but it felt like he was talking to strangers, the way they were acting.

'They're just weirded out cos I suddenly came back to life…' He assured himself.

He was weirded out too. He could remember lying on the ground, dying, then, darkness. He could occasionally see fuzzy objects through the darkness and hear a high pitched female laughter that made him feel unwell, but that was about it.

He shrugged off the thoughts and smiled brightly. He didn't care what had happened to him or how he had come back, all he knew was he was going to have a talk with Allen once they got the chance, and then once Allen was ok, he was going to ravish the hell out of him. Unless…

Lavi paled. He'd told Allen twice that he loved him, and Allen hadn't even answered. He also hadn't hugged him or kissed him. Could that mean that… Allen didn't feel for him anymore?

He mentally shook himself. He didn't want to think like that. He would talk to Allen, and fix things.

--

Allen stole a glance behind him and Kanda. Lavi was walking with his hands behind his head, eye closed and humming happily. Allen inwardly groaned and pressed his cheek against Kanda's back. He had come to a decision.

He would stay with Kanda.

He knew that there was no way Lavi would love him after he found out he'd gotten with Kanda so shortly after his death, so it would lighten the guilt slightly that Kanda would not hate him. And… He had to have some kind of tender feeling for the Japanese man… Right?

They'd both known each other for a long time, even longer he had known Lavi, so there had to be something there, buried in his heart…

Allen sighed. He just didn't know anymore. He knew what he was supposed to feel, but it was impossible to feel it.

'Look!' Lavi yelled, 'A town!'

Allen looked up to see a small town coming into view. He felt Kanda pick up his pace, and Lavi complained about being left behind.

They booked into a small motel room once arriving, and Lavi said he would quickly go see if there was a restaurant that let you buy take-out since Allen couldn't move much. He said goodbye and shut the door. Now, Allen was alone with Kanda.

The samurai was sitting on a chair, staring intensely at him with his steely gaze. Allen fidgeted, feeling uncomfortable.

'What's going on?' Kanda finally spoke.

'Nothing.'

'Liar. Lavi comes back to life and it changes nothing? You bastard, tell the truth for once!'

'I am!' Allen sat forward, his muscles stretching painfully, 'You're the one who's not believing me! I'm with you! If you want to break up, then do it! Because I'm not going to!'

Kanda got up and reached Allen's bed in one stride. Allen recoiled, fearing the older man was going to hit him, but instead of raising his hand, he put it on the mattress next to Allen as he climbed on top of him and kissed him. Allen made a surprised noise and tried to push Kanda off, but Kanda caught both his wrists and pressed them onto the bed, stopping his struggles.

'Kanda…' Allen felt tears sting his eyes, 'Come on… Don't…'

'Do you love me?'

'What?'

'ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION!'

'….Y-yes…'

Kanda could sense the dishonesty and hurt in his voice, but he didn't stop. Allen had said yes, so this was his own fault. He started to unbutton the fifteen-year-olds shirt slowly with one hand.

'Don't Kanda!' Allen tried to pull away from the kiss, 'I-I- I can't… It hurts to move!'

'You don't have to move.'

Allen was silence as Kanda kissed him firmly. He closed his eyes. Maybe this was for the best, maybe this was what it took to love him, and maybe he should just let him do what he wanted….

Kanda put his hands on Allen's shoulders, releasing his arms. Allen didn't struggle, so he started kissing down his jaw, and to his neck. Allen stifled a sob, and Kanda unzipped his long coat, and began to tug off his black shirt.

Then, there was a gasp. Kanda sat up suddenly and moved so he could look at the door. Lavi was standing there with his hand on the door knob, staring open mouthed in shock.

'Rabbit! What are you doing?!'

'I…I…' Lavi didn't seem to be able to get the words out. He swallowed and held up his hands. One held a bag of steaming food, the other held flowers… Allen felt a pang as he realized they were his favorite kind, lilies.

'I got food for us… And Allen! I thought these flowers would make you feel better! B-But I see you two are busy now so I'll…'

His voice cracked. He left the packages by the door and shut it. Kanda got off the bed and pulled his shirt back on silently. Allen buttoned up his own shirt, feeling sick. Lavi hated him now. He was sure.

Finally, the tears came.

--

**Wow that's a long chapter…. Ok, a few people are kind of confused about this story.**

**There will not be a lemon. Sorry pervy fangirls but I might faint if I tried that again.**

**There shall only be sexual references and jokes.**

**And, um, yeah, about what you just read... GOMEN NASAI! **

**REVIEW!**


	5. HATE

**I don't own this and crap….**

**--**

Lavi ran. He didn't know were he was running to, but dammit if he was going to stop. He ran through the streets, not even apologising as he bumped into people. He just wanted to get the hell away.

'_I'm such an idiot! Of course he's moved on! The signs were but I refused to see it...'_

He slowed to a walking pace, then stopped completely and doubled over, hands on his knees as he panted.

'Stupid-Stupid-Stupid! STUPID! ARGH!'

He punched the brick wall next to him, hard, and felt pain as he heard a sickening crunch. He pulled his hand away, trembling, and nursed it as blood welled from the hurt knuckles, staining his fingerless gloves.

'Stupid...' He murmured, leaning against the cool wall, 'It's all so stupid...'

He stood there, eyes closed, for an immeasurable amount of minutes. Ok, yeah, he hadn't expected Allen to wait for him since he was dead, but still, he hadn't really expected him to move on that quickly! And to Kanda for Christ's sake! Allen used to hate Kanda! Or rather dislike him intensely...

'Dammit...' Lavi winced as he took off his glove to check the damage. The skin as grazed and bloody. He stared at the wall, and imagined punching it again, only this time the wall looked like Kanda's face. Not wanting to injure his other hand, he kicked instead, growled angrily and continued walking, wiping his hand on his jacket as he did.

He'd searched an entire street to look for a place that would sell Allen's favourite food, then he'd gone to trouble of buying some expensive flowers for him to make him happy, and he'd walked into their motel room to find the love of his life and one of his best friends about to do the horizontal tango?! This just didn't seem fair!

'_Guess I lost my reason for coming back...'_

Lavi blinked as he remembered something. A man had told him he needed a reason to live. Well, he'd chosen Allen... And guess what! Allen had become the plaything of a stupid, moody, bad-mouthed samurai who didn't know the meaning of the word "Nice."

'Oi, Rabbit.'

Lavi froze as he heard Kanda's voice. He plastered a smile on his face and turned to look.

'Yes Yu-Chan?' He said in a peppy voice, 'You and Allen finished already?'

'Idiot,' Kanda looked irritated, 'We didn't do anything.'

'Well it sure looked like s-something to me,' Lavi was still smiling, but his voice was cracking. 'Anyway, I've decided I'm going on ahead back to the order. You guys obviously want to be alone and I'll just get in your way.'

'Baka, there isn't a train going to Paris until tomor-'

'I'll walk!' Lavi cried angrily. He spun around on his heel and stalked off. Kanda made an annoyed noise and made his way back to the motel. It was obvious the rabbit was in deep pain over this, and although Kanda felt a small pang of sympathy, he didn't feel any guilt. Allen had made his choice and he wasn't going to worry over ex lovers.

--

Lavi walked next to the tracks, hands in his pockets. He knew he was being silly and childish, but right now, he didn't think he could bear to look at Kanda and Allen. If that meant walking all the way to the order, fine with that.

He'd never really hated anyone before, you know, aside from the millennium earl and the Noah for hurting his friends, but now, he could feel hot rage boiling up inside him, and he was afraid if he looked at any humans right now, he might do something he'd regret later on.

He wasn't really planning to walk across the country back to headquarters, he'd just walk to the next town and find a train to take him home. He wondered briefly how everyone would react, but then reminded himself Kanda probably told Komui over the phone.

Stupid Kanda.

The skin on his arm was irritated, so he pulled his hands from his pocket and scratched it, and tried to see beyond the horizon, one green eye searching for a town. He wished he had his hammer right now, and with a cold feeling he realised it was probably destroyed after he died.

'Damn, this is not a good start to the week...'

--

Allen looked up as Kanda threw open the door, swearing in Japanese under his breath. The man went over to his bed and looked through his bag for something.

'D-did you find him?' Allen's voice shook.

'Yes. He said he was going to the order by himself. He's an idiot, walking all that way with no weapon.'

'He's not an idiot...' Allen felt a knife through his heart, 'He just hates me...'

Kanda was silent. He pulled a bar of wrapped soap from his bag, then went to through the door that hid the bathroom, slamming the door behind him. Allen sobbed and pulled the covers over his head, blocking out the outside world. He felt awful, and not just because of his injuries.

_He hates me he hates me he hates me..._

_--_

_Allen jerked awake. Lavi jumped back from him in surprise and grinned. Allen's eyes narrowed as he noticed the red head held a black texta in his hand._

'_Lavi...' He glared._

'_Hehe, sorry, but, um... I THINK THIS TEXTA IS POSSESSED BY INNOCENCE!' Lavi exclaimed, eye wide, arms gesturing dramatically, 'It suddenly jumped into my hand and made me write on your face!'_

_Allen stared flatly at him. The redhead sweatdropped._

'_Not buying it, huh?'_

'_Not a bit.' Allen sighed in exasperation and glanced at himself in the train window. Across his face scrawled in messy handwriting were the words "__**PROPERTY OF LAVI."**__ Allen looked back at the older boy, an evil glint in his eye._

'_U-um...' Lavi backed away as Allen slowly stood up, 'Allen?'_

_Allen raised his fist and brought it down hard on Lavi's head. Little lights blocked his vision and he stumbled back onto the other seat, clasping his head and groaning. Then, he felt something cold and wet on his face, and his vision cleared in time for Allen to pull his hand away, smiling happily. He put the top back on the texta and pocketed it._

'_There, now we're even.'_

_Lavi blinked, and looked at the window. In Allen's neat scrawl, written on his face, were the words "__**PROPERTY OF ALLEN."**_

'Awww!' Lavi jumped forward to glomp the younger boy, pressing Allen's face against his chest. 'I'm never gonna let you go now!'

'_L-Lavi...' Allen gasped patting his arm, 'C-c-can't bre-breath...'_

--

Allen stifled a sob and dried his eyes on the sheets. He felt sick, and the room felt hot.

He pushed the blankets from his face and was surprised to find it was dark outside. Kanda lay on the other bed, sleeping on his side so Allen couldn't see his face. The white-haired exorcist sighed in relief, and with difficulty he swung his stiff legs off the bed. He stumbled over to the balcony door, let himself out and hut the glass door, and leant against the railing, feeling the cool breath blowing in his hair. He hadn't felt this bad since when Lavi died, and now, with him hating him like this, it felt like he'd lost him all over again.

'I'm so sorry Lavi...' Allen leant his forehead on the railing, trembling, 'I...'

He couldn't continue. He seriously wasn't sure what to do. Yes, he had made the decision to stay with Kanda, deleted all possible chances of him and Lavi re-salvaging their relationship, but now, he was beginning to regret it. He had no idea it would hurt so much.

After a while, he cooled down, and went back in. Maybe when he woke this would all be a terrible nightmare and everything would be back to normal.

But of course, he was not that lucky.

--

**Ah, teen angst.**

**Ok, please review!**


	6. Metal

**I don't own dgm no matter how much I wuv it….**

**Sorry for the late update!**

**--**

By the time Lavi made it to the next town, his feet were sore and tired. Quickly, he found a train station, and to his relief made it in time to board a train for Paris. He collapsed in relief on the comfortable cushions, pulled the complimentary blanket from under the seat over his body, and closed his eye.

_Oh Kanda..._

'Jesus Christ!' Lavi growled angrily, sitting up. He hit his head a few times with his fist. 'Stop it stop it stop it!'

He leant his head against the cool glass of the window, trying to clear his mind. Bookman had taught him several ways to achieve empty mindedness for the purpose of keeping calm, and the most fool proof one wasn't even working! He couldn't get that stupid image out of his head...

Without his permission, a tear slid down his cheek. He raised his hand to wipe it away with his wrist, but as he did, he stopped and stared at his arm. Around his wrist was a small metal band that he was sure hadn't been there a few hours before. He touched it. It felt smooth and hard like metal, but it was warm like skin and... Was that a pulse?!

He inspected it closer. There was a definite line where his slightly tanned skin tone turned to steel grey, but there was no seam, as though the band was a part of his skin. He tried to pull it off, and winced, feeling like he'd been pinched there.

'_Ok this is really weird...'_ He thought, '_Am I turning into metal?'_

He patted his legs and up his arms. Everything else felt normal, apart from the band on his arm. He took a deep breath.

'Calm down Lavi,' He told himself, 'no use worrying... I'll get Komui to look at it when I get home...'

He tried closing his eyes again.

_That feels nice Kanda..._

'DAMMIT YOU BASTARD!' Lavi angrily threw a punch at the window, cracking the crash and causing his already wounded hand to bleed again. He swore and wiped the blood away. It looked as though he wouldn't be able to sleep all trip.

--

Allen and Kanda got out of the boat and started their descent up the stairs. Allen lagged behind slightly, still stiff from his injuries. He was feeling faint. Some time, he was going to have to face Lavi, and when he did... He just didn't know what he was going to say.

Suddenly, Kanda stopped, turned and grabbed his shoulders. Allen froze, afraid Kanda was going to try and kiss him again, but instead the samurai placed his hand on Allen's forehead. His eyes narrowed.

'Baka, you've got a fever. How could be so stupid as to catch a cold?'

'That's not my fault! That Akuma pushed me into the ice!'

'So? You're the one who fell for their trap. You've got nothing to blame but your own stupidity.'

'You know,' Allen grunted in annoyance, 'Even if you supposedly like me you're still a total ass!'

Kanda stiffened. Allen swallowed nervously.

'Did it ever occur to you...' Kanda breathed slowly, 'That I'm only like this because I don't like to see you getting hurt?'

Allen blinked. He'd never thought of that. Kanda stood up straight.

'Come on, we're getting Komui to look at you.'

'N-no...' Allen shook his head, thinking of drills, 'I'm fine; it's just a fever...'

'Whatever, suit yourself.'

To Allen's relief, Kanda let go and continued on. Allen sighed in relief and leant against the wall. Absent-mindedly, he placed his own hand where Kanda's had been before. Yes he had a fever, and yes he felt kind of faint, but he was fine. He just needed something to eat.

He pushed himself off the wall and walked up the last of the steps and entered through to the corridor outside. Standing near bye were two finders.

'No way! Lavi's really alive?' One said.

'Yeah,' the other nodded, 'I saw him last night heading for the supervisor's office.'

Allen sighed and went the other way. At least he made it back safely.

After a few minutes of walking, he came to the large oaken doors of the cafeteria. He passed through them and headed towards the ordering window.

'Oh Allen!' Jerry smiled brightly, 'So glad to see you're back! Isn't it fantastic Lavi was resurrected?'

'Yeah,' Allen nodded.

'No one knows how it's possible though. The science team conducted every test on him to find if he was human and they all came out positive, it's as though he was never dead.'

'Hm...'

'Oh sorry! There I go again, with my constant chatter! Now, your order...?

Allen gave his order, and then went to sit at a table, fatigued. Kanda was a few tables away, eating his soba noodles, and Allen turned away so the samurai couldn't see him. The cafeteria seemed especially noisy today.

After a few minutes, he got back up and went to stand in line for his food.

'Allen.'

Allen's blood ran cold. He turned. Lavi was staring at him. His hair was down, and he'd changed into a long sleeved shirt.

'L-Lavi!' Allen gasped, 'I-I'm so sorry you saw that! But Kanda-'

'It's ok,' Lavi held up his hand wearing a soft smile, 'It's been two months, not like I could expect you to wait while I was dead... When did you two get together?'

'Um... tweeksaftafunral...'

'Pardon?'

'Two weeks after your funeral...'

Lavi's smile disappeared. Allen braced himself for a punch or a kick or anything the redhead could deliver. Instead, however, the bookman breathed in slowly.

'I see. Am I really that easy to forget after just two weeks?'

Those words were like an icy knife through Allen's heart. He wished Lavi had hit him instead, anything would have been better then the hurt in Lavi's voice as he said that.

'Lavi, it wasn't like that!' Allen begged, 'Please don't-'

'I'll see you around Allen...' Lavi sighed and left the line. Allen watched him go. The white haired boy sighed sadly and went to sit back down. He'd lost his appetite.

--

'It's all going well,' Akita smiled, opening her eyes.

'Really?' Road looked ecstatic, 'That's great! I was afraid letting Lavi's soul go would result in him and Allen getting back together! I'm so glad we found you, Noah of jealousy!'

'Yeah,' Akita nodded, 'This is way more fun then school!'

'Great...' Tykki thought, turning the page of his book, 'Two Roads now... Anyway,' He spoke up, 'What exactly do you plan to achieve by this?'

'Well,' Akita looked thoughtful, 'By using an image of Allen's father to tell Lavi how to release himself, he thinks he is completely normal, and is going to live normal. However, once my spell takes full effect, the Eyepatch will be under my complete control.'

'Didn't Road already try this?'

'This is different. This time, it will be Lavi's true heart wanting to destroy Allen, and not just his Bookman's heart. And because Lavi doesn't know what we're doing, the exorcists haven't a clue.'

'Once Allen is dead,' Road piped, 'What will you do with Lavi?'

'He will go home saying Allen was killed by an Akuma, then he will destroy the rest of the Order little by little.'

'Pretty cool plan!'

'Yeah...'

--

Lavi sat in the library, filling out some records. His arm was itching again, and scratched it.

'_Any Idea what it is?' Lavi gestured to the metal on his arm._

'_No idea,' Komui shook his head, 'It's some kind of steel, but what it's doing in your skin... Lavi are you sure you can't remember anything else?'_

'_No, nothing...'_

The redhead groaned and leant his head in his hands. Just then, there was a knock at the door.

'Lavi!'

Lavi looked up to see Johnny running forward. The younger scientist stopped in front of the table, smiling.

'Hey Johnny, what's up?'

'Found your Innocence.' Johnny reached into his lab coat and pulled out the redhead's hammer.

'Thanks!' Lavi reached to take it, 'Where'd you find it?'

'Someone left it outside the-'

'ARGH!' Lavi screamed in pain as his fingers closed around the handle of his hammer. Green electricity erupted from it, burning his hand. He hastily withdrew it, leaving both him and Johnny looking shocked.

'What the..?' Johnny stared at the hammer, then back at Lavi, 'But... Why...'

'I don't know either!' Lavi looked at his hand. The metal on his arm was glowing blue slightly, but as he watched it faded back to normal plain steel.

'We'd better take you back to Supervisor Komui,' Johnny suggested. Lavi go up and followed the sixteen year old out of the library.

--

**Ok, no idea how old Johnny is but he appears about fifteen or sixteen to me.**

**Oh, plot twists and cliff hangers! Please refrain from throwing squids at me...**

**REVEIW!**


	7. Breakup

**I don't own dgm, but if I wouldn't mind owning the boys…heh…**

**Allen: Hide me!**

**(Hides behind Lavi)**

**--**

Lavi stared over Komui's shoulder, trying to see what the scientist was doing. As he did, Komui turned to face him.

'Well, it doesn't look like it's been tampered with…' The scientist sighed, holding the innocence up, 'Try touching it with your other hand.'

Lavi cautiously reached out and brushed the handle with his left hand. When nothing happened, he gripped it more firmly, and was relieved to see the hammer stayed the same.

'Right,' Komui adjusted his glasses, 'Seems you can't touch it with the hand the metal is on. Until we find more out, I'm afraid you'll have to fight with your left hand.'

'Aw...' Lavi groaned, 'But I'm right handed! If I fight with my left I'll be blown to bits cos I can't aim straight!'

'You'll just have to train with your left hand until it feels right,' Komui smiled and shrugged, 'It's not that hard to do. Kanda did that so he could use the twin sword illusion and now he can fight with either hand easily.'

'Komui, I hate to be rude, but please don't talk about that son of a bitch while I'm in the room.'

Komui blinked in surprise at the sudden dark aura around the normally cheerful Bookman. He cleared his throat. _So he found out about those two..._

'Right, um, sorry...'

'Anyway,' Lavi grinned, 'If we're all done here I'd like to go now.'

--

Allen threw himself on his bed and buried his face in the pillow, trembling from the effort of holding back sobs. He breathed in slowly, then rolled onto his back, and pressed his palms to his eyes to block out the light of his lamp.

He'd hurt Lavi. Despite being sure he'd made the right decision, he'd become a terrible person. He'd only ever felt this bad about himself once before.

'_Um... L-Lavi?' Allen murmured quietly, 'Can I... Tell you something?'_

'_Uh-huh...'Lavi rolled over in the bed they were sharing and wrapped his arm tightly around the smaller boy, smiling. 'You can tell me anything.'_

'_Well...' Allen took an uncertain breath, 'I think it was my fault that Mana died.'_

'_What?' Lavi blinked._

'_Yeah,' Allen nodded, a pained look on his face, 'I'm sure he's dead cos of me. I-I didn't mean to though! But...'_

'_Allen, you're not capable of hurting another human being, you're too good a person for that!'_

'_No!' Allen sat up, distressed, 'I'm a horrible person! If I hadn't been so selfish, I wouldn't have run out onto the road and... And...'_

'_Calm down Allen,' Lavi was sitting up too now. He cupped Allen's cheek and made the shorter boy look at him. He gently kissed him on the lips._

'_Ok, how is it your fault he died?'_

'_Well...' Allen wrung his hands nervously, 'I was twelve or so, and it was night time. Mana had bought me a soccer ball to play with, and I wanted to go play with it outside but he told me I couldn't cos it was dark, but I disobeyed him, and while I was out there, I accidently kicked the ball across the street. It was dark, and when I couldn't see any carriages or stuff coming I ran across to get it, but then I heard Mana yelling at me, and then I HEARD HORSES AND THEN THERE WAS THIS BIG CRASH AND AND AND-!'_

_Allen was sobbing uncontrollably now. Lavi took him in his arms and Allen rested his head against his chest. Lavi stroked his hair._

'_Hey, it's ok...'_

'_It's not! I f I had just listened to Mana he wouldn't have had to push me out of the way!'_

'_Allen, you were just a child. That's what kids do sometimes! They disobey their parents. What happened to him was a terrible accident, but it was certainly not your fault...'_

'_I don't know...' Allen still sounded uncertain of himself._

'_Allen Walker, listen to me. You're not a bad person, you're not a murderer and you would never hurt another person. Understand?'_

'_U-understand...' Allen nodded, smiling a little. Lavi grinned and kissed him again._

For years Allen had been certain it had been his fault his beloved father was dead, and Lavi, with those simple words, had managed to make him feel better about it. And he'd just gone and ripped that person's heart to shreds.

Allen took his hands away from his eyes, and rolled onto his stomach. He reached for his bedside draw, opened it and pulled out Lavi's green headband. He'd kept it secretly after he'd died, and he'd been meaning to give it back along with the redhead's hammer, but he'd been unable to part with it.

He sat up, put the strong battle-sturdy material in his pocket, then got off his bed and left the room. He walked briskly down the hall, carefully considering the things he was going to say. He didn't want him to be mad at him, but he simply couldn't go on like this. It was too painful. Perhaps he would understand.

Finally, after an immeasurable amount of time, he came to the right room and knocked. The door opened, revealing Kanda.

'W-We need to talk.'

--

Allen took a shaky breath and gently knocked on Lavi's door. Seconds passed before he heard movement, and the door swung opened. Lavi's face was unreadable.

'Yes?'

'Uhm..' Allen too the redhead's headband from his pocket, 'Th-this is yours. I um, kept it while... Just take it.'

Lavi stared at the green material and surprise, and then took it. Allen continued.

'And I want you to know I broke up with Kanda. I know that doesn't fix anything and it doesn't change what I did but I just want you to know that I never stopped loving you, and I was stupid for thinking I could change that.'

He waited for Lavi to react. Slam the door, yell, punch, kick, anything to break this silence. Finally, Lavi's gaze softened and he sighed.

'Why'd you try to change it though?'

'Because it hurt. I was in love with someone dead, and it tore me apart to know I'd never be able to be with you again. I thought that if I started dating Kanda, my feelings would change for him. And then after you came back...' Allen fisted his hands to stop his voice from trembling, 'I knew you would hate me once you found out I'd been dating Kanda so I... But I've realised my mistake!' Allen bowed his head, 'So... I'm just so sorry Lavi! If I could take it all back, I would! I understand completely if you hate me!'

Again, the white-haired exorcist waited. He could hear Lavi breathing calmly, but dared not to look up at his face.

_Say something please..._

'I don't hate you. I'm sorry if it seemed like I did.'

Allen's eyes widened in shock, and he looked up. Lavi's face looked serious.

'But I'm not ready to forgive you. I can't get the picture of you two sleeping together! Do you know how painful that is? To see someone you love with someone else?'

'No...' Allen shook his head sadly, 'I don't... But by the sounds of it, it must be around the same level as your lover dead and hating you.'

'True...'

'And for the record,' Allen smiled weakly, 'Kanda and I never slept together.'

A look of relief seemed to spread across the bookman's face, making the heavy feeling in Allen's chest dissolve a little. Lavi seemed to scratch his head nervously, and Allen decided he'd said enough for tonight.

'W-well, I just wanted to get those things straight...' Allen bowed again, 'Goodnight, Lavi.'

The boy tried to smile, and then left, somewhat unwillingly. He knew Lavi was still angry at him, so he was going to leave him a little while and let the redhead think. He wanted to be with him again, but if Lavi chose not to... Then that was his punishment for his stupidity.

Lavi, meanwhile, stared after Allen as he hurried away. Once the boy was out of sight, he glanced at the headband in his hand. Allen had kept this, even while he was with Yu, so it was a good indication of Allen's feelings. He smiled softly and went back into his room. Maybe they still had a chance.

--

Akita slammed her small fist on the table angrily.

'NO! The Bookman's jealousy is fading!

'What?' Road looked up in alarm, 'So that means...?'

'There's not enough left to activate my spell.' The ten-year-old growled. 'And it was getting so close to the top too...'

She crossed her arms and closed her eyes. The rest of the Noah looked at her curiously from across the dinner table. Suddenly, she stood up.

'Master Millennium! Can I borrow a few hundred Akuma or so pretty please?'

'Of course you can Akita,' The earl nodded, 'but can I ask what you're planning to do with them?'

'I'm just gonna use them to create a diversion,' the child smiled. 'And then, if all goes well, I'll have Lavi nice and jealous in no time.'

--

Kanda hadn't really been that surprised when Allen had come to break up with him, and although he was in love with the beansprout, he was glad the idiot was being smart for once.

He was not mad, and had not been violent, much to Allen's surprise; he merely smirked and commented that it had "taken him long enough." And privately, Kanda hadn't liked the thought of Lavi hating him, since although he was an annoying rabbit... He was still pretty much the closest thing he had to a friend in this god forsaken place and if he was hated by him then that would be even more annoying of him. Although Kanda meditated and did calming exercises every day, the redhead's friendly teasing could easily drive him over the edge. He wondered what would happen if the friendly teasing actually turned into spiteful insults.

Just an hour after Allen had broken up with him, Kanda was woken by a rapping at his door. He sat up, smoothed his bed hair and went to answer the door, ready to kill who ever dared to call him this late. Unfortunately, it was Lenalee, and as it was against his morals to hit women, he was forced to stay his hand.

'What is it? Don't you know what time it is?'

'Sorry Kanda,' The Chinese girl shrugged, 'But Brother needs you in his office for a mission.'

'Fine.'

The samurai closed the door and went to change into day clothes, followed by his exorcist coat. He strapped mugen to his back, and then went out into the hall.

--

'Sorry Kanda,' Komui smiled in apology, 'I know this is the third mission in a row, but the other exorcists have jobs, and Allen is still recovering from his injuries and Lavi... Well you can guess why Lavi can't go on missions just yet. And as for Lenalee, she is also recovering from a sprained wrist.'

'Whatever,' Kanda waved the excuses away, 'Just tell me what's going on so I can get some sleep on the train.'

The older man nodded and handed Kanda the mission guide, as Kanda flicked through it Komui gave a verbal explanation.

'A large number of Akuma have suddenly appeared in a town in England, and completely wiped the population of the town out, yet for some reason they have stayed in place. We suspect Innocence, but it's too dangerous to send finders in. We'll send you, then once you assess the situation we'll send back-up, as some exorcists should be available by then.'

'That won't be necessary, I can finish a difficult job on my own, I don't need a baby sitter.'

'Well it's just a precaution,' The Chinese man shrugged,

Kanda grunted in response, and then slowly got up to leave.

--

**Wooh! I made it to five pages! Anyway, REVEIW! If you do, I'll put something good in the next chapter...**

**Btw, have you guys seen Alto in Macross frontier? I did and I was like "Kanda Cosplayer!"**


	8. Midday Romance

**Ok, since you guys gave such good reviews, I'm gonna put in that good thing I promised in this chapter!**

**Oh, and btw, I know last chapter I said the mission was in England, but I meant Italy. Dunno why I typed England… So the mission is in Italy!**

**Been watching Macross Frontier lately, good show, Alto is very hot. Whenever i see him and Luca and Mikhail (Is that how you spell it?) getting into their mechas and flying around I'm all "Team Bishonen ARE GO!" Lol, bad thunderbirds joke. Grr, Alto better end up with Ranka... Sheryl is nowhere near as awsome in my opinion.**

**I don't own dgm. Or Macross frontier, which i should really stop taking about when no one cares.**

**--**

'Kanda's missing again?' Allen blinked in surprise.

'Yup,' Komui sighed, 'Sent him on a scouting mission and he never reported how much back up he would need. He's probably just being stubborn like he was in the Victorio mission. Anyway, I take it you've healed fully?'

'Yeah…' Allen nodded.

'Good, then I'll send you as back-up... Oh, and Lavi too. '

'Lavi? But it's only been a few days since-'

'I know but everything seems to be right with him physically and mentally, so there's no real problem… Unless,' Komui looked down at Allen over his glasses, 'You two are still on bad terms?'

'I don't think we are. He's been acting normally towards me.'

'Well that's good. Go find Lavi and tell him to get ready, then go to the train station.'

'Ok…'

--

After Allen saw Lavi in the library, he explained the mission. He was afraid Lavi would act coldly towards the idea of a mission with Kanda, but instead he smiled and laughed about "Yu being stubborn", then got up to get his coat from his room. Allen followed and met him as he was coming out pulling his gloves on and strapping his hammer holster to his leg. They then set off.

'So Italy huh?' Lavi put his head behind his head casually as the two walked towards the station, 'Sounds fun, haven't been to Italy in ages. I love their food...'

'Hm, so do I... Where was Bookman?'

'Oh, he's out recording this thing in China. I spoke to him on the phone and he seemed really pissed off at me... I swear I can already feel his foot connecting with my head...'

The redhead shuddered and rubbed his forearms as though cold. They were on the train now, and opening the compartment door. Allen couldn't resist a laugh and Lavi glared at him.

'Oh sure, you laugh cos you're not the one getting hurt. To everyone else its _hilarious_ slapstick, but YOU try living with that every day! See how you like it!'

At this point Allen was in stitches from laughter. He sat down clutching his sides, laughing loudly. Seeing the boy laugh like that after carrying such a dark look since he'd got back, he couldn't help but smile. He sat down opposite to him so he could face him.

'How could you be so sadistic as to enjoy my pain?!' Lavi said in mock hurt.

'S-sorry...' Allen chuckled as he wiped his eyes, 'I guess when you don't laugh for a long time your body tries to make up for it. Ah, my ribs hurt...'

The boy sat back and leant against the window. He stared out at the mid-morning-lit fields rushing past them as the train moved. Lavi sighed and did the same. It would take a day or two to arrive in Italy. Fortunately the town they were heading for was right on the boarder so they could get off earlier then that. Lavi absent-mindedly scratched his wrist through the glove. When he'd woken up a few days ago, the metal had faded in colour, and wasn't as solid, so perhaps whatever infliction he had was slowly getting better. And to top it all off, he and Allen were on good terms. The thought of they boy made him turn his head to look at him. Allen was staring back at him, but when his grey eyes met Lavi's green one, the white haired exorcist hastily looked away, blushing. Lavi smiled softly and went back to staring out the window.

'_...And I want you to know I broke up with Kanda. I know that doesn't fix anything and it doesn't change what I did but I just want you to know that I never stopped loving you...'_

Lavi hadn't been able to get those words out of his head. He wanted to think things over, but the knowledge of Allen's feelings was pretty much trying to push his logic out the door. And when he looked all cute and blushy like he did a moment ago...

'_Get it together Lavi,'_ He tried to calm himself, '_You don't want to rush in only to have things fall apart on you.'_

'Um, Lavi?' Allen spoke suddenly.

'Y-yes?' Lavi crashed back to earth.

'Are... I mean...Oh god, how to say this... Uh... Look, I hope that you don't act negatively towards Kanda, because I'm sure he would be upset if he lost you as a friend even if he doesn't admit it. Everything that happened between me and him was completely my doing, so you shouldn't blame him.'

'It's ok...' Lavi shrugged and smiled, 'To be honest, I'm still a bit jealous that he had you but now that everything has been cleared up I'm fine with him.'

'Good... But, I thought I told you? He never had me. I've only ever belonged to you.'

'Hm...' Lavi sighed, 'Yes, you say that but... I'm not sure.'

'I know, but still...' Allen smiled nervously, his face going pink, 'I... I really miss being with you Lavi.'

Lavi looked up in surprise and blinked stupidly. Allen chuckled and stood up.

'Sorry, I'm not helping, am I? I can't expect you the feel right with me after all that's happened. Anyway, I'm going to the dining car, do you want anything?'

'No thanks...' Lavi shook his head, still wearing the same expression. Allen grinned and left. Lavi stared after him, and fought the urge to chase after the other exorcist. The redhead breathed deeply, laid across the soft cushion of the seat, pulled his headband over his eyes and tried to sleep a little. He missed Allen too, he'd never felt so lonely without him, but he had to wait. He had to be sure.

--

'Lavi, we're here.'

Lavi jerked awake and sat up as he felt a hand on his shoulder. He pulled his headband up and saw Allen smiling at him, carrying their suitcases in his hands. The train was slowing.

'What, already?' Lavi yawned and stretched as he sat up, 'Feels like I only fell asleep a minute ago...'

Allen smiled fondly at him, and slid the compartment door open. They joined the crowd milling out the door, exited the train station and stepped out into a warm breeze. It was dark still, but rays of sunlight were peaking over the far-off hills. Allen handed their suitcases to Lavi and pulled out a map.

'Kay... We're supposed to go to the south exit of this town, and if we keep walking we should come to the town by evening. We have to be careful of Akuma though.'

'Sounds good,' Lavi grinned. Allen took his suitcase back, and they passed through the cobbled streets and out a large archway onto a dirt road through green countryside.

--

The walk was fairly pleasant. They chatted until dawn, then had a small breakfast (Much to Allen's annoyance there wasn't enough rations for him to eat his usual amount), then went back to walking and talking. Lavi sighed and put his hands behind his head.

'So far this has been more like a holiday then a mission. It's too easy; there must be something big coming.'

'Why do you assume that?' Allen raised his eyebrow.

'Cos you're on the mission! Every mission you're on seems to take a dramatic turn. Haven't you noticed?''

'Heh...' Allen grinned, 'Guess so... Well, you said it yourself, I'm Mr. Unlucky...'

They settled into an awkward silence. Allen stared at Lavi out of the corner of his eye. The Bookman had on his usual smile, but somehow Allen felt it masked deep thought.

The sun beat down on them, and by midday they were sweating from the heat. Allen suggested they stop for a rest, and Lavi gladly agreed. They settled in the shade of a tree off the side of the road.

'Ah that's better...' Lavi yawned widely as he lay down on the grass. Allen smiled as he took off his hot exorcist coat and folded it beside him, then took off his zip-up boots and placed them neatly next to the coat. Lavi did the same, and then took a swig from his water bottle.

'Hot day today and we have to walk in it...' Lavi yawned again, 'Our bad luck begins.'

Allen made an uncommitted noise and laid down also, and turned and his side whilst closing his eyes. From his slowed and even breathing, Lavi guessed he had fallen asleep. He edged closer and smiled. Allen's face looked so serene. Unable to help himself, Lavi reached out and stroked his cheek. Allen made no reaction.

'Heh, he was always a heavy sleeper...'

--

Allen wasn't sure how long he was asleep, but by the fact the sun hadn't moved when he woke, he guessed only ten minutes or so. He yawned and stretched.

'Sleep well?' Lavi was sitting beside him, smiling.

'Yeah...' Allen nodded.

'Good...' he stood up,' we'd better get going if we want to make it there before dark.'

Allen nodded, and Lavi held out his hand for Allen to take it. Allen stared at it in surprise for a moment, then grasped it. Lavi grinned inwardly, pulled him up, and brought him close, locking him in a tight embrace. Without missing a step, he leaned his head forward and kissed the shorter.. Allen's eyes widened in shock, then closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around Lavi, who deepened the kiss.

_Sorry this is so sudden, Allen, but I can't deny my feelings anymore. I want to be with you, and you say you want to be with me as well. I haven't fully forgiven you yet, but I'm sure you can make it up to me._

_--_

'Dammit!' Akita yanked at her long black hair, eyes blazing, 'It's gone! I was so sure sending Allen on a mission to rescue Kanda would work, but no, that stupid Bookman had to go too!'

'What are you going to do now?' Road enquired.

'I'm going to see big sister Lulubell!'

'Sounds like you have another plan...'

--

**Well? You likey? Hatey? Wanna throw stuff at me?**

**Gomen, this chapter tried to be good but wasn't.**

**Reveiw!**


	9. Arrival at the town

**If I owned dgm we'd all be doomed. But since we're not doomed, I don't own it.**

**--**

Allen and Lavi stared down the steep cliff. Several hundred meters below them was the town. It looked dark end empty, and the sun was starting to set, exaggerating the shadows.

'Can you see any Akuma?' Lavi enquired, yawning from tiredness.

'No...' Allen shook his head. 'Maybe Kanda finished them off already?'

'Who knows...? Well, we'd better go look for him in any case.'

The white-haired boy nodded, and the two walked along the cliff until they found the path down. It was cut into the rock, and narrow, meaning they had to go one at a time. After a while, they came to a shelf, and paused. There was a large dark cave in the cliff. Suddenly, Allen's eye activated. In an instant, they activated their innocence.

'Come out Akuma!'

A loud cackle erupted from the cave, and a frog-like level two stepped out into the red sunset holding out his arm, which looked like a gun.

'Just you, huh?' Lavi smirked.

'Just me will be enough!' The Akuma yelled, and a beam of grey light exploded from the gun. Lavi grew his hammer and protected him and Allen with it, but to his surprise the light dodged beneath the hammer and hit the ground Lavi was standing on.

'ARGH!'

The ground crumbled and broke and Lavi disappeared. Allen yelled and ran to use his clown belt, but suddenly, he felt something crack against his head and the world went dark.

--

Kanda could hear a lot of screaming going on. Creeping out of his hiding place (he hated using the term but at the moment it seemed right), and he peered towards the cliff. What looked like the rabbit was falling towards the ground. As he watched, Lavi pointed his hammer at the ground, and the head raced ahead of him until it collided with the ground. His descent slowed and he lowered himself to the ground. The samurai watching ran towards him, and got to him in time for the redhead to jump off the hammer to the ground.

'Yu!' He cried happily.

'Quit calling me that!' Kanda glared as he approached, 'What are you doing here? I told Komui I could handle it on my own.'

'So? At least you won't be lonely now!'

'Che.'

'Anyway...' Lavi looked around, 'Weren't there supposed to be like a billion Akuma here? We only ran into one, and Allen should be taking care of right now.'

'They leave during the day,' Kanda explained in a monotone, 'I don't know why, since they don't seem to mind sunlight. I haven't found any Innocence yet, but there must be some around or they wouldn't keep coming back.'

'Hm...' Lavi smiled at him. Kanda almost felt a little relieved at how Lavi was behaving. This meant he wasn't pissed off anymore, and he was slightly less annoying.

'Well,' Lavi looked up, 'Allen's up there. I better go get him in case he got injured. Wait for me here, k.'

'Whatever.'

The Japanese boy watched as Lavi jumped back onto his hammer and flew back up to the shelf he had fallen from. He saw him jump onto the rock, then after a few moments he came back down with something under his arm. As he landed back to earth, Kanda felt a small spark of concern as he realised Allen was unconscious.

'Poor thing,' Lavi chuckled as he moved Allen so he was giving him a piggy back, 'Every time he gets hurt...'

'He should learn to be more careful,' Kanda huffed indignantly, 'his incompetence is going to get him killed.'

'Aw, that's mean, Yu.'

A vein throbbed in Kanda's temple, but he decided to let it go. He'd given up on teaching Lavi respect long ago and only demanded to be called by his last name out of annoyance. He turned to walk back to the place he had been sleeping. He'd been up all night fighting, and was still tired. He had two hours until the Akuma returned and dammit, he was going to make use of those two hours. He heard Lavi call out to him and follow him as he walked along the street of the deserted town, where several buildings had been destroyed. He found the basement door and went down.

'Close the doors behind you.' He said to Lavi without turning around.

'Ok.'

The samurai went to the corner and stopped in front of an old mattress he'd found. He turned.

'I'm tired and I'm going to sleep. Wake me when the Akuma arrive.'

'Right.' Lavi nodded happily. 'And let me guess... If I wake you before then you'll impale me?'

'The way you read minds is truly eerie, rabbit brat.'

Kanda then laid down and went to sleep.

--

Lavi sat next to where he'd laid Allen down, tapping his finger impatiently on his knee. He didn't like the silence, and he wanted Allen to wake up already. Not only cos of his concern for the younger's well-being, or the fact he was lonely, but because of a rather silly and irrational fear, that maybe Allen and Kanda were in each other's dream, making out and having a dream-affair. He knew that was silly and it actually made him want to laugh, but after everything...

He sighed and pushed the thought from his mind. Allen had explained everything, and they were now on the road to restoring their relationship. He was confident everything would be ok.

Bored, he checked the state of the metal band on his wrist. It had completely disappeared after the kiss, meaning he could use his hammer properly again. He wasn't sure what had happened to it but he was happy it was gone.

Just then, Allen's eyes fluttered open.

'Hey,' Lavi smiled quietly so he wouldn't disturb the sleeping grouch in the corner, 'You ok?'

'I'm ok...' Allen nodded as he sat up, 'I just have a headache.'

'Well you've got no sign of concussion. What happened?'

'I'm not sure...' The fifteen-year-old shrugged, 'I saw you fall then... Nothing.'

'Weird... Oh well, Kanda's asleep in the corner so-'

'He is?! Is he alright?'

'Yeah, he's fine.' Lavi blinked, surprised by the sudden alarm on the boys face. 'Why?'

'Oh...' Allen stared at the ground sheepishly, 'Nothing...'

Lavi raised his eyebrow curiously. Was that a blush on his face? No, that couldn't be right. It was just the red light from the setting sun shining through the cracks of the doors.

Just then, Lavi heard a loud scream erupt from outside.

'Akuma?!' Lavi glanced at Allen. Allen shook his head.

'Must be a human. I'll be right back!'

The redhead jumped up and ran for the doors. As he flung them open, he could see there was a small girl with long black hair standing on the path up the cliff. Upon closer inspection, the path had crumbled beneath her and she was clinging for her life.

'SHIN!'

Lavi activated his hammer and zoomed up towards where the girl was. She couldn't have been more then nine or ten years old.

'Help meeeee!' She cried, tears streaming down her doll-like face.

'I'm here!' Lavi held her around her waist, 'Let go! I've got you!'

The girl obeyed and fell into the exorcists arms. She clung to his shirt, crying from fear. Lavi instructed the hammer to bring them back to earth.

'I-I was so scared!' The girl sobbed, 'I was coming here to visit a friend and while I was walking down the path... The path...!'

'You shouldn't go down that path,' Lavi felt a stab of irony, 'It's dangerous. Where are your parents?'

'I don't have any! I took a carriage here and they dropped me off at the end of the road.'

'Hm...' Lavi sighed as he put the girl down. The Akuma would be here soon, so there was no time to get the girl back home. She'd have to stay in hiding until morning.

'Come on,' He grabbed her hand, 'we need to get you to some place safe.'

'Why?' She stared up at him with brown eyes as they walked, 'is it cos of the monsters? I was told there were monsters here.'

'Yes, the monsters will come out soon.'

The little girl grasped Lavi's hand harder and quickened her pace. Although he didn't like it when kids were put in danger, he was glad they were more ready to believe the stories of monsters, thus making most them easier to put out of danger, provided they were afraid of the bedtime tales their parents told them.

They came to the door of the basement, and Lavi pulled it open. He gasped.

Allen had pressed a now-awake Kanda up against the wall, and had locked the surprised looking teen in a deep kiss, and he seemed to be getting handsy.

--

**And so there is the new failure of an update. It was kind of rushed cos I wasn't allowed to read a new manga till I finished it.**

**REVEIW!**


	10. Love stronger then Jealousy

**Ok… Gomen for leaving you guys on a cliff. Please refrain from throwing evil cyborg koalas at me.**

**OMG HOW STUPID IS SPELL-CHECK?! IT TOTALLY THOUGHT CYBORG WASN'T A REAL WORD!!**

**I don't own this.**

**--**

Lavi stared in shock. As he watched, Allen slowly pulled away from Kanda and stared back. There wasn't even any guilt or remorse in his expression.

'What the hell was that?!' Kanda growled angrily, 'Lavi, I don't know what he was doing so don't go blaming this on me, got it?'

'I-I need to go...' Lavi stuttered and turned to leave. He was vaguely aware of Kanda yelling something at him, but he was running so fast he couldn't hear.

Again.

He'd seen them again. Only, it was different this time! Wasn't it only earlier that day that they'd gotten back together? Hadn't Allen spent most of the week declaring his love, and breaking up with Kanda because he did not love him?

The redhead slowed to a walking pace. He'd done this exact same thing before; running from the two people he was closest to. Why had they kissed? There had to be some explanation!

'Hi there!'

Lavi stopped to see the little girl he had rescued smiling up at him.

'Um, hi. Listen kid, it's dangerous out here-'

'Did seeing those other two boys kissing upset you?'

'Uh...' Lavi sweatdropped, 'I really shouldn't talk to you about that-'

'It's ok; I know boys can kiss as well as a boy and a girl. So why are you upset? You can tell me.'

Lavi looked uncertainly at her and sighed. He sat down.

'Well, its cos... I'm in love and the person I loved said they loved me back, but it looks like they actually love someone else so now I don't know what to do.'

'...Are you jealous of them?'

'Of course I am! Why-'

Lavi looked up to continue speaking, but as he did, the girl suddenly had her hand on his face. He stared through her fingers, surprised.

'Allen took your heart and ripped it in two, then led you on and did it again,' She spoke in a monotone voice, 'and your supposed friend Kanda Yu seduced that boy and took him from you. Wouldn't you like revenge? Wouldn't you like to see them dead?'

'I-I...' Lavi suddenly felt drowsy, 'I don't like them being with...each other...'

'Then go get rid of them,' the girl smiled, and took a knife from her dress pocket. Lavi stood up and took it from her, then turned to walk back to where Kanda and Allen were. He was going to get rid of the problem. As he walked away, the girl's skin turned grey, and her eyes turned gold. The jealousy was back, and at full level, as proven by the metal band that had appeared around his wrist. He wouldn't be able to use his Innocence, but he could still sneak up on his friends.

'Is your plan working?' Allen suddenly appeared beside her.

'Definitely,' she nodded happily, 'Thanks for your help, Lulubell. You can go now.'

'Happy to assist,' the exorcist was suddenly replaced by the tall Noah woman.

--

Kanda looked up as Lavi threw open the doors. The redhead had a strange look on his face.

'Where's Allen?'

'How should I know?' The samurai shrugged, 'He left right after you did, I thought he was chasing after you. Look, I seriously didn't have anything to do with him kissing me, so-'

'Shut up.'

Kanda blinked and glared.

'What did you just say to me?!'

'SHUT UP!'

Suddenly, Lavi lunged forward, brandishing a knife. Kanda yelled in surprise and dodged out of the way. He reached for Mugen lying on the ground, but then Lavi weaved around and stabbed his arm. Kanda cried out in pain and clutched it, stumbling back against the wall.

'Wh-what the hell, Rabbit?!' Kanda choked through the pain slightly. Lavi advanced, a manic grin on his face. Kanda had to think fast. He couldn't reach Mugen, he couldn't get around Lavi, and he didn't want to hurt Lavi, who had suddenly gone crazy and wanted to knife him.

'Lavi!' Kanda shouted, 'Calm the hell down! Just cos your boyfriend kissed me is no reason to kill me!'

'Oh?' Lavi chuckled. He was right up close to Kanda now, and the samurai could feel the coolness of the blade against his neck.

'Believe me, _Yu-Chan;_ if I didn't have to kill you, I wouldn't, but unfortunately... I WANT TO!'

Lavi raised his hand to slice through Kanda's neck. Kanda took the opportunity to dive to the floor, grab his katana, unsheathe it, and shield himself from another of Lavi's blow with a clang of metal. Kanda jumped up and pointed the sword at Lavi's heart. The Bookman smiled.

'Do it, I dare you.'

Kanda tightened his grip. He swallowed, unsure of what to do. Lavi had been his friend since they were fifteen! He couldn't just run him through, even if the Rabbit was an annoying brat.

'_Dammit!' _He thought, '_Where the friggin' hell is the Beansprout?! HE BETTER GET HERE SOON!'_

'Ok,' Kanda breathed in calmly, 'You are going to sit down and not move, or I swear I'll kill you without hesitation. Got it?'

'No...' Lavi chuckled, 'You Idiot, you can't kill me! You've threatened and chased me around with that sword for years saying you were going to kill me! If you really had it in you, you would have done it the first time we met.'

Lavi gripped the edge of the blade with his left hand, and Kanda watched as blood leaked through his fingers and dripped to the floor. The bookman grinned and moved the sword away from his heart, with Kanda attempting to put up a struggle but failing. He'd killed countless Akuma and even a Noah, but he'd never killed a human.

Lavi started walking forward, brandishing the knife. Kanda backed away, cursing his cowardice.

'No Lavi!' A girls voice suddenly cried, 'Don't kill him yet!'

Lavi stopped. A small Noah girl with long hair emerged from the shadows.

'Who the hell are you?!' Kanda growled angrily.

'I'm Akita, Noah of Jealously. Anyway, Lavi can't kill you just yet. It's more of a show if Allen is the first one he kills. Speaking of which...'

Akita clapped her hands. A large heart-shaped door appeared before them and opened. Allen walked out. His grey eyes were half-closed and blank.

'Shit, what did you do to him?!'

'Nothing,' Akita smiled, 'just gave him a bit of medicine to calm him down. It's going to wear off soon though, I want to see his look of shock when he finds the person he loves about to kill him.'

'Well if he really does love Lavi why did he kiss me then?'

'Oh, that wasn't Allen, that was Lulubell, the Noah of form. I take it you've heard of her? Anyway... Lavi?'

Lavi suddenly jumped forward and brought the hilt of the knife down on Kanda's head hard. Kanda grunted in pain, and his eyes rolled into the back of his head as he slid to the ground, unconscious.

'Ok!' Akita smiled brightly, 'Now that he's out of the way, let's take this outside!'

--

'_Wake up.'_

Allen gasped. He was standing in the middle of a street during a sunset. Lavi was standing close to him, with his hand holding a knife to the vein in Allen's throat.

'L-Lavi?! What's going on? Why are you-'

'Be quiet.' Lavi growled, 'I need to kill you.'

Allen's eyes widened in confusion. He backed away, and Lavi kept coming.

'Lavi, why... What's going on?!'

'He's going to kill you!' A voice called, 'He's under my spell so if you wanna live you better fight back!'

'What?! Lavi, snap out of it!'

Lavi yelled and lunged forward. Allen cried out in surprise and jumped back, stumbling slightly as he did. He activated crowned clown as Lavi raised his hand to strike.

'CLOWN BELT!'

White silk extended from Allen and wrapped itself around Lavi's right hand, pushing it back. Suddenly, green sparks erupted from it and Lavi screamed in pain. He dropped to his knees, and Allen let go.

'LAVI!' He cried, 'what's wrong?!'

'Touching Innocence hurts him,' the voice laughed.

'Dammit!' Lavi suddenly stood and attempted to strike Allen, 'Sit still and die!'

--

Allen jumped back each time Lavi tried to stab him. He'd keep going like this until Allen was dead. Allen had broken his heart twice, and he was beyond forgiveness. The younger wasn't putting up a fight, but he was still fast on his feet, so he couldn't get near enough to get a proper swing at him.

Had Allen really ever loved him?

Had their relationship just been a silly game to him?

Even if it had, it had meant everything to Lavi. He loved him.

Lavi stopped. Allen looked at him curiously and cautiously.

'Lavi...?'

'Hey!' The voice cried, 'Why'd you stop?!'

'I'm not going to kill the person I love,' Lavi stated in a monotone, 'No matter how jealous I am...Even if he doesn't love me back.'

'What?' Allen blinked, 'Of course I love you, Lavi!'

'Yes, yes, we all love everyone!' The voice sounded angry. Allen looked around, but no matter where he looked he couldn't see the source of the voice.

'Lavi, take that knife in your hand and shove it through his heart!'

'NO!'

'FINE I'LL DO IT MYSELF!'

Allen cried out in pain as he felt a blow to his head. He fell to his knees, clutching the sore spot. He felt a hand on his cheek, but there was nothing there.

'No one who doesn't feel jealousy can see me,' the girl's voice was low and amused, 'So you won't even see your attacker...!'

'DON'T YOU DARE!'

Lavi ran forward and seemed to grab thin air. He struggled with it, and cried out and stumbled back.

'Lavi!' Allen jumped to his feet.

'You're a real pain!' The voice addressed Lavi angrily, 'I'll end you too!'

Then, there was the flash of metal, the dull thud of a blade entering flesh, and Lavi looked shocked as he fell to the ground. Blood was seeping through his shirt.

'LAVI!'

--

**Ok, this was a sucky chapter, but seriously! My mind is designed for angst and romance! Not fight scenes!**

**REVEIW!**


	11. Again

**I don't own d.gray-man.**

**SYDNEY ANIMANIA IN TWO WEEKS PEOPLE! I wonder if I could throw together a Kanda outfit in time. I wouldn't need the coat; I'D just need to tie back my hair and put on some black pants and a shirt and make a cardboard mugen…hm…**

**--**

Lavi gasped as he felt the sharp sword the Noah was holding go through his stomach. He could hear Allen scream his name, but it sounded far off. The Noah girl smirked.

'Poor Lavi,' Lavi screamed as she twisted the sword, 'you wanted to be with your Allen so bad.'

'BITCH!' Lavi yelled. He raised his arm, closed his eyes and drove he knife into her back. He heard her strangled cry of surprise, and felt her grip slip away.

He grunted as he landed on his back. The sky looked dark, and was dotted with stars. The full moon made everything look almost like daytime.

'Lavi!' Allen's face appeared above him. They boy looked frantic as he took off his coat and pressed it to Lavi's wound. 'Oh god oh god... No...'

'Relax, Allen...' Lavi tried to smile, 'I'm fine-'

Suddenly, Lavi raised his hand to his mouth and coughed, tasting copper. He pulled away his hand to find it sticky with dark blood.

'Ok, maybe I'm not fine...'

'I'm sorry Lavi! This is all my fault! If I hadn't gotten knocked out by that Akuma... Oh god...'

Allen pulled the coat away slightly to check the bleeding. The sword was in pretty deep, enough that it was standing by itself. Blood was welling uncontrollably around it, the skin torn by the serrated edge of the blade. Lavi craned his neck to see, but Allen leaned over him to block his view.

'Th-that bad, huh?' His voice was choked by pain. 'Come on, Allen, you don't need to protect me, I've probably seen worse...'

'But... Oh god Lavi...' Tears streaked down Allen's face. They were miles from help, and to move Lavi they would need to remove the sword... But once they did that, he would die. There was no way out of it. He tried to wipe the tears away with his sleeve. Lavi tried to see his stomach, and saw the sword sticking out. He reached forward to grasp the blade, but Allen grabbed his wrist.

'Come on Allen,' Lavi smiled weakly, 'it's really uncomfortable. Lemme do it.'

'N-no..' Alln shook his head, eyes shut tight , 'L-Lavi... You're gonna... There's no... You're...'

'I'll be fine.'

The redhead stretched his arm up and cupped Allen's cheek. He wiped the liquid away with his thumb, and brought his head down, and shared a sweet kiss. He didn't want to die again, but he was going to die anyway, and he really didn't like the prospect of a long and painful wait for nothing.

'I love you Allen.'

Allen subbed and leant his forehead against the taller boys. Lavi smiled, and pulled the sword from his gut. It didn't hurt that much, but he could feel a surge of blood, followed by an intense dizziness. He didn't have long.

He grunted in pain as he moved his head into Allen's lap. The redhead grasped one of Allen's hands and pressed it against his cheek. It felt cool and comforting. There was a throbbing pain in his gut, and it didn't feel that bad.

He felt Allen stroke his hair. It felt nice; normally it was Lavi that stroked Allen's hair. He sighed and snuggled to the boy closer, being careful not to aggravate the wound in his stomach. He was sleepy, so he closed his eyes.

--

Lavi was still and quiet. Allen knew he wasn't dead yet though. He'd seen Lavi dead before, and at the moment, he was just sleeping. The blood had soaked through the exorcist coat-turned bandage and was now leaking onto the ground.

His face looked deathly pale as he stroked his cheek, creating a stark contrast with his crimson hair. He didn't have more then a minute or two.

'Beansprout.'

Allen looked up. Kanda was walking towards him, his face a look of mixed shock and something unnamed.

'Whats...?'

'He was under the control of a Noah...' Allen stated blankly, trying to keep his voice calm, 'But he broke free and... She killed him...'

Kanda was silent as he walked closer. He crouched down next to them, and placed a finger on Lavi's neck. There was a pulse, but it was so faint he could barely feel it. He glanced at Allen. The boys face was that of utter distraught, as though he had simply given up and he'd been eaten by despair. The samurai hated it when Allen was mopey.

'He can still be saved.'

'No he can't...' Allen shook his head dismally, 'There's-'

'Dammit Beansprout! You never listen properly! If I say he can be saved then he can be freaking saved!'

Without further explanation, the Japanese exorcist reached forward, ripped Lavi's shirt open, moved the cloth from the wound and placed his hand on the torn bloody flesh. When he'd received his hourglass curse, he'd been told he could choose to revive another at the cost of one petal, and until he hadn't used that power. But there was no way he was going to let Lavi die, and have Allen be a cry-baby more then he already is... Or maybe he was doing this out of love, he didn't really know. But as long a Lavi wasn't completely dead, he could use a petal of his lotus to bring him back.

He closed his eyes and muttered a sentence in Japanese. Allen stared curiously at him, and then looked down at Lavi's body. His eyes widened. The wound was quickly healing up, and colour was spreading back into the redhead's skin.

Then, Lavi gasped and sat up, panting and clutching his heart. Allen cried out in surprise and jumped back, unable to believe it. Lavi had been resurrected for a second time?

'L-Lavi?'

Lavi glanced at him, a confused look on his face.

'Yeah? What am I doing alive again?'

'LAVI!' Allen cried out joyfully and launched himself forward. He knocked a surprised yet pleased bookman to the ground in a tight embrace.

'Don't ever...' Allen pressed his face against the older boy's chest, 'Don't you ever die again!'

--

**Hm, I don't get it! I just can't seem to write good material!**

**Well, review...**

**The story is nearing it's end!**


	12. Two lovers

**Wows, you people actually liked the last chapter…. I must have really low self esteem… Ah well! Got bored so…. FLUFF ATTACK! (throws chibi allens and lavis at you)**

**I don't own this.**

**--**

As the trio walked back to town, everything was properly explained. Allen had been knocked out by an Akuma, and was replaced by Lulubell, who was to kiss Kanda in front of Lavi to make him jealous, in order to gain control of him. There were quite a few things they still didn't get, but Lavi was just glad he was alive, Kanda simply wasn't interested in something that had passed, and Allen... Allen just wanted Lavi to forgive him. The older boy knew that the him who had kissed Kanda had been an imposter, but Lavi had only just started to forgive Allen, and the white-hired boy was afraid Lavi had gone back to square one from the shock of it all.

However, at that moment, Allen felt a hand slid into his. He looked up through the twilight to see Lavi grinning at him.

'You ok?' The redhead asked, 'You seem kind of out of it.'

'I'm alright…' Allen smiled back, reassured.

'Oi, you two' Kanda glanced back at them apathetically, 'The town is nearing. We're going to stay in a motel for the night then catch a train in the morning. Got it?'

The other exorcists nodded. Up ahead the lights of the town loomed. Lavi yawned widely.

'Man I'm tired...' He sighed, leaning his head heavily on Allen's shoulder as they walked. He snuggled his cheek against him and brought his arms around the boy, leaning almost all of his weight on him.

'Mph,' Allen made an uncomfortable noise, 'Lavi, you're heavy.'

'No I'm not, you're just light. Eat something and you might actually grow.'

'Uh, Lavi, you do know I'm a parasite type, right? And what do you mean, "grow"?!'

'Relax, my vertically challenged friend, I mean that in the nicest way possible...'

Allen glared in annoyance, but he could feel a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. He slipped his arm around Lavi's shoulder to support him better... Or maybe it was to hold him closer, if that were possible.

After around fifteen minutes of walking, they came to the village. They quickly located the first hotel, checked in, and went to their rooms. Kanda had chosen a separate room as always, leaving Allen and Lavi in a two-bed room.

--

Lavi dropped his bloodstained/ ripped clothing in a heap beside his bed and collapsed on the mattress in comfortable pyjamas. He'd have to get Johnny to make him a new coat, as it was beyond salvageable. In the bathroom he could hear Allen take his turn in the shower.

A few minutes later, said fifteen year old stepped out, wearing the standard long-sleeved shirt and loose slacks he wore to bed. Lavi sat up, grinning. Allen glanced at him as the boy settled onto his own bed.

'What?'

'Have I ever told you you're cute?'

'At least a thousand times, yes...'

'Well I'm saying it again; you're cute.'

'Hmmm...' Allen made an annoyed noise, but a blush was creeping across his cheeks. Lavi hopped off his bed, walked over and sat in front of Allen. He placed his hands on the boys' shoulders and brought him in for a quick kiss.

'I love you.' Lavi smiled as he leant his forehead against the others, 'I love you so much it physically, emotionally and mentally hurts when we're apart, and when we're together, well... There's no comparison to how complete and happy I feel.'

'Lavi...' Allen's eyes were wide, 'you can say that after all that's happened with us?''

'Course I can, can't you?'

'Un...' Allen nodded, a blissful smile on his face, 'I love you too Lavi. I'm not smart enough to put it like you did, but... I do...'

Lavi grinned, and locked Allen in another kiss, this one deeper and more passionate then the first. Without breaking away, Lavi put one arm around Allen's back and lowered him onto the pillow. The two broke away briefly to stare into each other's eyes and catch their breaths, before their lips interlocked again and they were lost in each other's love.

--

Lavi cuddled up against Allen's back, arm around his waist. He could sense sunlight beyond his eyelid, but he didn't want to leave the comfortable warmth just yet. This was too perfect, and Allen's hair smelt nice, intoxicating him.

'Mn...' Allen stirred, 'Lavi... We'd better get up...'

'No way,' Lavi inched all the more closer and grinned into Allen's hair, 'we're gonna stay in this room and make love for the rest of our lives.'

'But what'll we do for food?'

'We'll eat our clothes; we won't be needing them.'

Allen chuckled sleepily and rolled over in Lavi's arms to face the teen. They exchanged quick and sleepy kisses before Allen rested his head against the taller's collar bone, eyes closing again, still exhausted from last nights events, both good and bad.

'Lavi...'

'Hm?' Lavi stroked the smaller boy's spine firmly but gently to sooth him.

'Are we... Ok?'

'Yeah... I think we are.'

Allen nodded slightly as he drifted back to sleep. His breathing became slow and even. Lavi breathed Allen's scent in deeply. It was a cross between scented soap, and something else he couldn't quite name. Lying in that warm comfortable bed against each other's skin, everything felt right. He wanted to lie there forever, and not have to go home where the two were likely to be separated by their duties as exorcist and exorcist/bookman.

Yes, they'd lie there a bit longer. Just a little longer...

--

Kanda rapped the door with his knuckles smartly and listened for a reply. When he was met by silence, he opened the door a crack and peeked through. His comrades were still in sleeping, in the same bed in the other's arms no doubt. The samurai silently shut the door and went down to the front desk. He left a note with the man at the desk saying he'd gone on ahead.

He really didn't feel like waking the two up. Although it was out of character, he felt sympathy for the shit they'd both been put through. If they wanted some alone time, that was there business and he wasn't going to stop them. He preferred going home alone anyway.

Yes, the person he loved was with another man, and yes, he had just given up some of his life to keep this man alive... But all in all, he was just glad Allen wasn't going to act like a depressed zombie for the rest of his life.

--

**Aw, kawaii! See? My Brain is for love, not for war!**

**Only one chapter left! This was sort of just a filler. **

**Review!**


	13. last chapter rewrite

**Ok, I felt so bad about the crap level of the end of this that I decided to rewrite it.**

**I really don't own it.**

**--**

Kanda heard a knock at his door. He growled softly, got up and opened it. Lavi stood there, grinning happily.

'Hey, didn't wake ya, did I?'

'No. What is it, Rabbit?'

'Well, me and Allen just got back and... Can I come in?'

Kanda hesitated, then nodded and moved away from the door. The samurai went back in and sat on his bed, and looked at Lavi expectantly. The redhead pulled up the chair from under his desk, sat in front of the taller man and looked around.

'You know, Yu, a bit of decoration in here wouldn't kill ya. I feel like I just walked into a cave with a bed in it.'

'Shut up, and don't call me that. Wasn't there something you wanted to talk about?'

'Right...' The bookman nodded and smiled, 'Um... Just wanted to thank you... For bringing me back to life and stuff. And also... Ah, how to put it... Thanks for letting Allen go. I know you loved him too and it must have been hard on you.'

Kanda blinked, then regained his composure and made an annoyed sound.

'Stupid rabbit, I didn't let him go, he was the one who ended it.'

'Yeah, but he told me throughout your relationship you kept giving him openings to leave, cos you knew he still loved me. You didn't actually say "Leave", but you still cared about his feelings, and you didn't try to guilt trip him into staying. You're a really god person, Yu.'

Kanda glared. Lavi chuckled and stood up, and went to the door. As he turned the knob and pulled it open, he paused, and turned to the samurai, grinning brightly.

'You know what, Yu? I bet you'll find someone real soon who you'll love with all your heart, and who will love you right back. You really deserve to be happy.'

'You're being oddly emotional tonight Rabbit, I think you should see the nurse... Or maybe your stupid-disease has gotten worse.'

'Hm...' Lavi smiled before leaving. Kanda stared at the door for a second, and then sighed. He'd be lying if he'd said he didn't feel a little warm inside.

--

Lavi went into his bedroom and smiled as he saw the familiar lump beneath his covers. As he walked in and kicked his boots off, Allen stirred.

'Hmmm... Where'd you go?'

'Just had to thank Kanda for bringing me back and stuff. Sleepy?'

'Yeah... Riding on a train all day is exhausting for some reason...'

Lavi grinned, and went over to the wardrobe to change. He started stripping off, and heard the sheets on the bed ruffle as Allen moved.

'Why Allen,' Lavi looked around in mock hurt to see the boy sitting up and watching him, 'I had no idea you were such a pervert!'

'So?' Allen blushed and raised his eyebrow, 'You used to watch me undress all the time!'

'Yeah, I did...' Lavi buttoned up his pyjama shirt and reached for his pants, 'But you expect that from me. You, on the other hand, are innocent and cute.'

He switched out the light on the wall, came over and patted the exorcist on the head. He pouted, lay back down and rolled onto his side, settling back under the covers. Lavi snuggled up against his back and wrapped his arm around the shorter's waist. He felt Allen grasp his hand and hold it up near his heart. Lavi smiled and buried his face in the boy's hair.

'You smell good... Can I eat you?'

'No, I'll give you indigestion. Besides, I'm pretty sure cannibalism is illegal.'

'So?'

Allen laughed softly and rolled his silvery eyes before letting them shut.

He felt calm, and happy.

Everything was starting to feel normal again, and the silent fear that this was all a dream had disappeared when the two of them had made love in the motel room. It was wonderful, to have Lavi back, to be his again.

'Lavi... Um...'

'Yeah?' Lavi's voice sounded sleepy already.

'Nothing. Just wanted to hear your voice.'

He could practically hear the redhead smile. He felt Lavi place a kiss on his cheek.

'Goodnight Allen. Love you forever.'

'I love you forever too Lavi.'

--

**Not as long as I would have liked it, but better then the old version, right?**


End file.
